Damn! I can't remember ever seeing that much Madness on one Monday Night! I thought my head was going to explode! Three teams (Jersey Juggernauts, Having a Hard Time and Cleveland Steamers) came from behind to beat their opponents (Mahatma's Minions, Uffdalators and Fighting Poopy Diapers respectively). Another team (Everyone Go Deep) came back to take the lead, fell behind again on a 1-yd Booba TD catch, and then fell just short - as Freeman and McCardell ran out of time in trying to get a few more yards.

All 4 of these games had playoff implications. Mahatma's Minions' loss meant that BUBE has clinched GM Wang's 1st-ever Steamroller. HaHT's win has pulled them even (at 8-4) with Uffdalators and Dude - 1 game behind Joebob's Minions. Cleveland Steamers' win kept their playoff hopes alive - barely. While Fighting Poopy Diapers' loss eliminated Brodz from postseason contention. Boobies!' win almost assures Cals of a spot in the playoffs, while EGD's loss has Gary on the brink of elimination.

THE ROAD TO 16W (2 OCTOPI)

Projected IN: Wang 13-1, Joebob 11-3, Kevin 10-4, Clark 10-4
Richard 9-5, Cals 8-6, Gary 7-7, Ali 7-7

Projected OUT: Vesh 7-7, Stan 7-7, John 7-7, JoePa 5-9
Brodz 4-10, Brad 3-11, Adam 3-11, Shiv 1-13

Tiebreaker notes:
Kevin and Clark do not face each other in regular season. Tie broken by total pts scored.
5-way tie:
Gary 3-0 (beat John*, Vesh, Stan; does not play Ali)
Ali 2-1 (beat Vesh, Stan; lost to John)
Vesh 2-2 (beat John, Stan*; lost to Ali, Gary)
Stan 1-3 (beat John; lost to Ali, Gary, Vesh*)
John 1-3 (beat Ali; lost to Gary*, Vesh, Stan)
*projected win/loss

SLAPSHOT!

The Adams (27 team wins) division took 3 of 4 games against the Norris (21) division, while the Patrick (22) division split their 4 contests against the Smythe (26) division.

Brad, Joebob, Richard and Cals thereby claim the Campbell Cup (of chicken noodle soup) for the top division in RFL '01.

Highest scoring team: Mahatma's Minions - 47.6 ppg
Lowest scoring team: Blue Collar Workers - 26.8 ppg
Toughest defense: Mahatma's Minions - 30.7 ppg
Softest defense: Rabbis Rappin' on 'Roids - 46.5 ppg
League scoring average: 37.5 ppg (last year 38.7)

Getting to the bloody point... on to WIR #12!

****************************
**** GAME OF THE WEEK ****
****************************
Boobies! 47
Everyone Go Deep 45

Oh, the heartbreak for Gary...! Everyone Go Deep was down 41-34 heading into MNF action with both WRs matched up against Boobies!' TE Booba F. Freeman got loose deep once, but was tackled short of paydirt. But with yards and a 2-pt conversion, EGD took a 42-41 lead. Then from out of nowhere... a previously catchless Booba struck from 1-yd out - the pass from Favre *barely* clearing the outstretched fingertips of the covering LB! Cals surged back into the lead at 47-42. As the balance of the 2nd half played out, Gary got 3 more WR yardage pts - closing with 2, but time ran out with McCardell 19 yds short of the game-winning trey. The MNF heroics nearly overshadowed some intriguing Sunday action. J Stewart came back strong for EGD - perhaps filling in the final non-TE piece of a dangerous playoff team puzzle. For Cals, Culpepper's gimpiness has red lights flashing and alarms sounding throughout Boobies! HQs.
Scrub loss for Gary (3-2)

c'pep 0 hearst 12 antowain 9 tholt 9 pinky 0 bubba 6 akers 11
peyton 12 jstew 12 dominic 3 keenan 5 freeman 6 alge 0 nedney 7
---------------------------------------------------------------
Other games:

Blue Collar Workers 40
Pimps de la Nast 25

In 1997, Vesh's draft leftovers finished the regular season at 2-12 (Tim and Stan were the victims) - and then went 1-2 in the scrub bowl tournament. Blue Collar Workers are now 3-9 (John, Adam and Shiv) and will look to set the bar even higher for future draft leftover teams. The nightmare continues for Pimps de la Nast. 3-14 or 4-13 is the usual record for RFL's last-place dwellars. How low can Shiv go? Currently 1-11 with games against Kevin and John to close out the regular season... finishing the regular season at 1-13 is almost assured. Pimp Kurt Warner has continued his excellent RFL career this season, but Pimps Terrell Davis, Cris Carter, Wayne Chrebet and Chad Lewis have fallen off the RFL map. Brad, when Wang traded KJohnson to Richard back in October... he meant to trade Keyshawn - NOT Kevin. So Keyshawn is now on your team, and Kevin is now on BUBE!
Scrub win for Brad (2-0)

kitna 3 moe 6 lamar 9 kevj'son 12 heinz 0 pollard 9 dawson 1
warner 18 tyrone 0 tdavis 3 wjax 0 cris 0 chad 0 l'well 4
---------------------------------------------------------------
Mahatma's Minions 34 (10)
Jersey Juggernauts 34 (10+)

The once mighty Minions appear to be slipping badly. After averaging a scorching 51.9 ppg through the first 7 weeks of the season, Joebob's Minions have dropped below the 40-pt mark for the 1st 2 times in the last 5 weeks (Joebob is 2-3 during this period). Sources close to the team have gone on record as questioning Joebob's leadership abilities. A certain key member of the Minion backfield (the one with horns on his helmet) has been in touch with former GM Wally - and is awaiting the right time to bring Wally back into power. John's Jersey Juggernauts now have the distinction of losing to the lowest scoring team (BCW) and beating the highest scoring team (Minions). No team has ever been more up and down than John's Juggs. Clearly, the root of this behavior is the WR duo of Harrison and Thrash. Dunn and Bettis have a little more consistent. John has a most important matchup with Gary coming up.
Scrub win for John (2-0)

brady 3 mfaulk 27 huntley 0 price 0 isaac 0 walls 0 elam 4
vINTy 6 wdunn 0 bus 9 thrash 3 mhar'son 9 ej'son 0 hollis 7

MM bench: brunell 10 dayne X canidate 0 levens 0 rodsmith X
JJ bench: tgreen 6 azereoue 6...
---------------------------------------------------------------
Having a Hard Time 51
Uffdalators 45

Certain preseason fantasy football publications had Favre buried this year - saying that Brett's best days were behind him. But the word heading into RFL's Draft was that Favre was healthy again - and ready to kick ass like a city slicker riding a rented, domesticated donkey. HaHT was 15 pts down heading into MNF action and had Favre sitting on only 3 pts at the half. But after a 3rd quarter with 178 passing yds and 2 TD passes, Favre was up to 12 pts. Early in the 4th, Favre hit Schroeder to crack the 300-yd mark - tying HaHT with Uffdalators at 45. Richard had the win in hand (Kevin's bench was scoreless, while Richard's had 18), but Brett ran in a TD at the end to provide the final 51-45 score. Kevin is still on track to finish with the 3rd seed in the playoffs, but *must* find some QB production (5 goose-eggs in the last 6 weeks; 9th time in 12 weeks). Richard's WRs were shutout for the 2nd week in a row (the 6th time that has happened in 12 weeks).
Scrub loss for Kevin (1-2)

favre 21 priest 9 tom'son 12 oronde 0 w'brook 0 wycheck 0 v'jagt 9
vanpelt 0 rw''ms 9 dillon 9 tibrown 15 plaxico 3 sharpe 0 cahney 9
---------------------------------------------------------------
Black Knights of the Charles 53
Rabbis Rappin' on 'Roids 18

In the battle of 2 3-8 clubs, JoePa was able to catch Adam without a bullet (Tiki) in his Russian Roulette revolver. These 2 teams are also tied at 60 for the fewest RB pts so far in the season - even with Sir Michael busting out for a dozen this week. For Black Knights of the Charles, Sir Aaron has climbed up to #5 in QB scoring, and Sir Qadry is up to #15 among RFL's WRs. For Rabbis Rappin' on 'Roids, JGarcia continues to lead the League in QB scoring. JoePa will be playing the role of ''spoiler'' against Ali this week. But without Sir Fred, the Black Knights shouldn't have the firepower to hang with Bastard Moss and Co. Adam will try to put a 'roid-enhanced, king-sized nail in the coffin of Stan's playoff hopes this week. With Tiki's return and the RRR biorhythms on the upswing, Adam might have just enough offense to take down Stan - whose team is really struggling to score recently.

brooks 15 bennett 12 kfaulk 0 sch'der 12 qadry 9 riemer 0 wilkins 5
jgarcia 9 mgreen 0 chapman 0 hakim 3 moulds 3 freddie 0 mare 3
---------------------------------------------------------------
Dude 34
Brooding Unicorn Blithe Elephant 58

You just can't trust those damn weathermen. With rain and 30-40 mph winds forecast (by local stations and the FOX and ESPN pregame shows) for AZ at OAK on Sunday, Wang was scrambling to adjust his lineup. Should he bring in another QB for Gannon? Should he start a different WR for Boston? The ''Net'' only got a few drops of rain in the 2nd quarter, and sanity prevailed for Wang - as he left Gannon and Boston in to score 27. Clark had a tough time choosing 2 starters between MBooker, CConway and DJackson. 1st Booker was out, but then Clark sent Jackson to the showers early. In the end... Conway was the WR to get shutout. At TE, Wang thought Dude might get stuck with a cheap 0 when Clark didn't seem to know that Sloan was hurt. But sure enough... Clark brought in Becht on Saturday afternoon. You can't sneak one past Dude! Former Dude dude Duce came back to put up a dozen on his former team.

fiedler 3 shaun 12 eddie 9 booker 3 conway 0 becht 0 seabass 7
gannon 15 cmartin 6 duce 12 keyj'son 3 boston 12 byron 0 mgram 10
---------------------------------------------------------------
Short-Changed Bastards of Persia 46
Invasive Species 28

After starting the season 0-3, Invasive Species ran off 6 straight wins. Stan has now lost 3 in-a-row again - to have his record level off at 6-6. This loss really hurt Stan's run at a playoff spot - as IS will likely need to win their last 2 games (against Adam and Vesh) to make it in. Stan's starting RBs have combined for double digits only twice in 12 weeks - causing TOwens to question the integrity of the RBs and the front office. With the win (ending a 3-game losing streak), Short-Changed Bastards of Persia is right back in the thick of the playoff hunt. Projections say a win over JoePa this week (even with a loss against Clark in Week 14) should be enough to get Ali in a position to defend his Aglione Bowl crown - quite possibly facing newly-crowned Steamroller champion BUBE in the quarterfinals. With the SCBoP passing game potentially back in high-gear, Ali would be quite a feared opponent in the postseason.

mcnabb 12 mand'son 0 garner 3 rmoss 12 rice 9 kbrady 0 hall 10
flute 3 rand'son 0 maurice 0 to 9 dalex'er 6 dclark 6 chrissy 4
---------------------------------------------------------------
Fighting Poopy Diapers 43
Cleveland Steamers 51

With their faint playoff hopes barely registering a pulse, Baby Brodz and his Fighting Poopy Diapers came heavy - and with a load of hot stuff - good to go. The 43 scored by FPD was just 2 off their season-high and gave Brodz a 10-pt lead heading into Madness action. But... Vesh had 2 of his biggest guns going in MNF - Ahman and Jimmy ''Have coke and a smile'' Smith. Sure enough, Green and Smith made quick work of their 10-pt deficit... putting an 18-pt licking on FPD. The game within this game... Vesh backed into Emmitt's 12 pts when JJax couldn't go for CLE. And back judge Luckett (demoted from head ref after the PIT-DET coin toss fiasco a few Thanksgivings ago) cost Horn a 46-yd TD that would have left Horn just 4 yds short of a 24-pt game. The win was crucial for Cleveland Steamers' playoff drive. Vesh likely will need to beat Wang and Stan to have a shot at Aglione Bowl XII.

elvis 9 sdavis 3 pittman 9 graham 0 horn 15 tonyg 0 edinger 7
greasy 3 emmitt 12 ahman 12 jsmith 6 trb'n 3 conwell 0 stover 15

PLAYOFF PICTURE

GM, record (remaining regular season opponents)

Wang 11-1 (vesh, adam)
clinched #1 seed in playoffs.

Joebob 9-3 (cals, richard)
favored to win last 2 and claim #2 seed. already has wins over kevin and clark.

Richard 8-4 (brad, joebob)
has wins over kevin and clark, but their remaining schedules are less imposing.

Kevin 8-4 (shiv, gary)
win one and in. lose both and have some freaky stuff happen... kevin just might fall out of the playoffs.

Clark 8-4 (brodz, ali)
win one and in. lose both and have some freaky stuff happen... clark just might fall out of the playoffs.

Cals 7-5 (joebob, brad)
win one and cals should be in. lose both and cals just might fall out of the playoffs.

Gary 6-6 (john, kevin)
could get in with win against john and loss to kevin. has beaten vesh and stan. will not play ali (currently has 7 pt lead on ali).

Ali 6-6 (joepa, clark)
could get in with win against joepa and loss to clark. has beaten vesh and stan. lost to john.

Stan 6-6 (adam, vesh)
basically needs to win both. lost to ali and gary. has beaten john.

Vesh 6-6 (wang, stan)
basically needs to win both. lost to ali and gary. has beaten john.

John 6-6 (gary, shiv)
basically needs to win both. lost to stan and vesh. has beaten ali.

Brodz, JoePa, Brad, Adam and Shiv have been mathematically eliminated.

WHERE ARE THE 'SKINS FANS?

It certainly wasn't good for their draft position, and it certainly wasn't as satisfying as a win over the Giants would have been... but it sure was nice to see America's Team smoke the Redskins for the 9th straight time.

There was the 'skins' 5-game winning streak since losing to Dallas on MNF. There was Tony Banks' face's smirk when telling an interviewer, ''We're 5-5. The Cowboys aren't.'' There was LaVar Arrington bumbling and mumbling when trying to come up with a sound byte about the Redskins' bandwagon.

If Cals can have so many fellow RFL GMs who are Giants fans to mock whenever the Vikes blowout the G-men, why can't Richard and I have a few fellow RFL GMs who are 'skins fans?
********************************************************
SEASON POINTS LEADERS
*********************
QB
130 Jeff Garcia (Rabbis Rappin' on 'Roids)
128 Peyton Manning (Everyone Go Deep)
121 Kurt Warner (Pimps de la Nast)

RB
135 Shaun Alexander (Dude)
134 Marshall Faulk (Mahatma's Minions)
114 Ahman Green (Cleveland Steamers)
108 Ricky Williams (Uffdalators)
99 Priest Holmes (Having a Hard Time)
96 Corey Dillon (Uffdalators)
96 LaDainian Tomlinson (Having a Hard Time)

WR
126 Terrell Owens (Invasive Species)
114 Marvin Harrison (Jersey Juggernauts)
101 Rod Smith (Mahatma's Minions)
93 Tim Brown (Uffdalators)
90 David Boston (Brooding Unicorn Blithe Elephant)
72 Randy Moss (Short-Changed Bastards of Persia)

TE
44 Tony Gonzalez (Fighting Poopy Diapers)
42 Marcus Pollard (Blue Collar Workers)
42 Bubba Franks (Boobies!)

PK
92 John Carney (Uffdalators)
91 Sebastian Janikowski (Dude)
90 Jason Elam (Mahatma's Minions)

be sure to check:
The Season Points Leaders Page
...for a more complete listing of scoring leaders.

Cals	Advantage	Gary
MBrunell		DCulpepper
MFaulk		GHearst
RHuntley		ASmith
RSmith		THolt
IBruce		TPinkston
WWalls		BFranks
JElam		DAkers

The Everyone Go Deep-Jersey Juggernauts game has more direct playoff implications, but when the self-proclaimed ''guru'' and the beloved Founder of RFL collide... it's gotta be the GOTW.
One of these things is not like the other:
PinkFloyd, Pink, TPinkston, PinkPanther
Can you spot which one doesn't belong?
Todd Pinkston has 9 pts in 8 starts for Cals' Boobies! Pink Floyd, Pink, and the Pink Panther are each averaging a mere 1.125 ppg less than Pinkston.
Yes, Cals made Wang look ridiculous with the Amani Toomer transference last season. But what point is Cals trying to prove by lining up Pinkston week after week opposite THolt?!? Wang's true hope is that Cals will still be starting Pinkston should they meet in the playoffs. Pinkston was not in the lineup when Cals dealt Wang his only loss of the season (in Week 4's GOTW).
The 265-lb question in Boobies!' HQs is, ''Will Daunte be ready to go on Sunday?'' If yes, Cals should have a 3-6 pt edge at QB. If no, the 3-6 pt edge should go to Joebob. Huntley and Dayne are struggling to complement MFaulk in the Minion backfield. The Juggernauts proved that Faulk cannot do it alone this past weekend - allowing Faulk to hit for 27, but containing the other 6 Minions. Garrison and Antowain have developed into quite a potent RB duo for Cals. Rod's bad ankles and Pinkston's bad scoring potential kind of cancel each other out, but Rod is good for at least 50 yds whenever he puts on his helmet.
The Holt-Bruce matchup has pretty much been all Holt (Cals) so far this season. So, it says here that Isaac is overdue.
Even if Daunte is able to go, Minions should still be able to handle Boobies!

**** Cals might be facing BCW in Week 14 with the playoffs on the line, Joebob by 3 ****

3-Having a Hard Time (8-4, 40.0) by 6 over 1-Blue Collar Workers (3-9, 26.8)
Richard has the QB and RBs advantage. Brad will try to steal a win with the pass-catchers.

7-Short-Changed Bastards of Persia (6-6, 34.3) by 10 over 5-Black Knights of the Charles (4-8, 33.6)
Ali's McNabb-Moss-Rice trio could score enough to win this one by themselves. JoePa's only chance to win is to play some tough D.

6-Dude (8-4, 42.1) by 2 over 8-Fighting Poopy Diapers (4-8, 33.2)
Clark has a tangible RB edge. A big game for TGonzalez and/or JHorn could swing this one in favor of Brodz.

11-Uffdalators (8-4, 44.1) by 7 over 9-Pimps de la Nast (1-11, 32.6)
Kevin should dominate in the matchup of RBs and WRs. Shiv has Warner and Chad Lewis to try to make up that difference.

10-Everyone Go Deep (6-6, 34.8) by 5 over 12-Jersey Juggernauts (6-6, 34.7)
Gary needs his RBs to outproduce John's. Will Harrison and Thrash be up or down for John?

13-Rabbis Rappin' on 'Roids (3-9, 31.8) by 1 over 15-Invasive Species (6-6, 34.4)
JGarcia, Tiki, Moulds and Freddie could lead Adam to this upset special. Stan's RB condition doesn't look promising.

16-Brooding Unicorn Blithe Elephant (11-1, 47.1) by 4 over 14-Cleveland Steamers (6-6, 40.2)
Wang only has slight edges at QB and RB #2. If Griese or Ahman or JSmith go off, Vesh could easily take this one.

©1999-2001 RFL Inc.
All rights reserved.

Revised: December 4, 2001