After three weeks, only two undefeated teams remain: Ali's Heirs to the Ayatollah and Wang's Fire in the Hole. HTTA has done it with a Rams-like offense - averaging 57 ppg (Carpet Bombers is 2nd at 46.7). FITH is 3-0 thanks to 2 scrub wins and the League's 2nd ranked D - allowing 26 ppg (Minnesota Nice is 1st at 22.3).
Richard's The Everyday Tokers is still winless - the only team yet to taste sweet victory in RFL2k. After losing a heartbreaker in Monday Night Madness in Week 2 to All Jacked Up, The Tokers clearly were flat against Na Brown's Boys this Sunday.

MORE NUMBERS

Highest scoring team: Heirs to the Ayatollah - 57.0 ppg
Lowest scoring team: The Everyday Tokers - 25.0 ppg
Toughest defense: Minnesota Nice - 22.3 ppg
Softest defense: Curly Back Hair - 48.0 ppg
League scoring average: 36.1 ppg
Team with most 50-yard bonus pts: HTTA, 36 (out of a possible 45)
Teams with least bonus pts: Carpet Bombers and The Everyday Tokers, 18
The Yemen Division *swept* all 4 contests from the Oman Division, and the Djibouti Division took 3 of 4 from the Sao Tome & Principe Division.
Enough random babbling... on to WIR #3!

****************************
**** GAME OF THE WEEK ****
****************************
Heirs to the Ayatollah 48
Nasty Pimps 29

Ali was so confident of victory that he eschewed the PK position entirely - and even dropped a key bench player for a *2nd* "out-on-bye" PK. Mia Hamm handled the booting duties for HTTA, but was held scoreless by China. Marshall and Jacquez provided all the scoring Ali would need to punk the Nasty Pimps. Daunte and Robert ran up the score with 18 more. Alstott and TOwens did well for Shivan. But Pimps Brett, Roland and Priest are looking for new sets of ladies to get business hopping again.
Scrub Loss for Shivan (0-1)

c'pepper 6 mfaulk 27 rsmith 12 chrebet 0 green 3 chad 0 mia X
favre 0 alstott 9 priest 0 muhsin 6 towens 12 roland 0 daluiso 2
----------------------------------------------------------------------
%$!@#& 8
Minnesota Nice 25

Injury-ravaged %$!@#& is the first team to fall short of scoring double digits in RFL since the inception of the new 3-point line. Starting Elvis instead of "Skinhead" Kitna would have avoided this dubious distinction, but Kevin's St. Paul Pastels still would have triumphed. Curtis Martin and Ricky Williams ran circles around Gary's angrily wounded squad.
Scrub Win for Kevin (1-0)

kitna 3 rhett 3 floyd 0 morton 0 stokes 0 bjornson 0 christie 2
b'soe 3 cmartin 12 rw''ms 6 alex'der 0 jreed 0 alex'der 0 carney 4
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Curly Back Hair 46
TheArmchairQBAdventurePlayset(tm) 21

Stan's team was lead into battle by Keenan's dozen, but The Armchair Quarterback Adventure Playset (tm) QB Moses was unable to part Curly Back Hair's D. Little Charlie Garner delivered numerous bodyshots to Stan, and Olindo Mare finished off the KO during Sunday Nitro. While Stan was down, SDavis and Rocket kicked him some more on Monday Night. With the win, Adam beats out Richard for the 1st victory among RFL2k rookie GMs.

b'lein 3 sdavis 18 garner 12 rocket 3 jefferson 3 mitchell 0 mare 7
moses 0 dayne 3 jallen 0 rod 3 keenan 12 dudley 0 akers 3
----------------------------------------------------------------------
All Jacked Up 27
Black Ops 19

An unindentified DB for Clark's AJU squad gave Black Ops' Larry Centers an extra arm bar + twist to dislocate Larry's elbow and snuff out any hopes of Monday Night Magic for JoePa's legion of gloom. Tiki led the way with a dozen in this field exercise. Brian Mitchell made his first ever (?) appearance in RFL. Trung Canidate has made 3 (scoreless) appearances this season. WE ARE HURTING IN THE RB POSITION, FOLKS!!!
Scrub Win for Clark (1-0)

greasy 6 tiki 12 brmitchell 0 warrick 3 dhayes 3 fjones 0 anderson 3
gannon 6 canidate 0 centers 0 holt 3 kevj'son 3 sloan 3 hanson 4
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Carpet Bombers 30
Fresh Squeezed 57

Carpet Bombers lost this game when Tim's "Twin Tyrone" combo scored a total of 0 points. Warner and Watters did as much as they could, but Warner kept throwing the ball to Cals' I Bruce. Jamal and Germane also combined for 21 for Fresh Squeezed. Michael suited up, but spent the game playing with the water boys. After putting up 33 last week, Tim's Jimmy Smits was not only contained - but *stopped* - by Cals' suffocating man-to-man D.
Scrub Loss for Tim (0-1)

warner 12 tyrone 0 watters 12 jsmith 0 rice 0 tyrone 0 l'well 6
blake 3 jamala 12 biaka 6 isaac 15 crowell 9 jackie 6 stover 6
----------------------------------------------------------------------
TheDeterminedSpermWhichSquirmLikeWormsWithFirmSternPerms 25
Merry Munching Merkins 28

This contest went to Monday Night tied. Brodz had the edge in bench points, but Vesh had the prolific passing combo of Brad and Albert going against the non-existent Cowboy passing D. For 3.5 quarters it looked like Dallas might actually prevent Mmm from winning their 1st of the season. But then Johnson-to-Sellers snatched defeat from the jaws of victory for Brodz. Anderson and Moulds gave The Determined Sperm... a pair of 9s, but TGonzalez has inexplicably failed to score in 3 games. Tim Brown made his farewell performance a solid one with 15 for Vesh.
Scrub Win for Vesh (1-1)

banks 0 mand'son 9 prentice 0 trbrown 3 moulds 9 tonyg 0 opie 4
bj'son 3 duce 6 dillon 3 tibrown 15 aconnell 0 brady 0 vinatieri 1
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Crazed Beagles on the Run 30
Fire in the Hole 32

Wang's FITH fell ass-backwards into yet another win as Emmitt stumbled around for 50+ yards, and Primetime failed to stop Emmitt on the goalline. Wang is rumored willing to trade Emmitt and a SF Giants World Series ticket for Tiki Barber right about now. Wally's RB duo of Warrick and KFaulk totally outplayed FITH's Emmitt and JStewart, but the lack of a backup Crazed Beagle QB (PManning was out) cost Wally this game. Jeff George is about a week away from taking over for BJohnson, and Kordell is about 3 years removed from being servicable.
Scrub Loss for Wally (1-2)

kordell 0 dunn 9 kfaulk 12 marcus 3 freeman 0 riem'ma 0 j'kowski 6
rj'son 9 emmitt 9 stewart 0 toomer 0 mathis 0 sharpe 3 wilkins 11
----------------------------------------------------------------------
The Everyday Tokers 16
Na Brown's Boys 42

It looks like Na Brown's Boys' running back corps has finally gotten off their rockers. Unfortunately for Joebob... Bettis only has one more game left this season against each the Browns and Bengals. Richard's TET offensive has not yet inflicted any casualties after 3 weeks of combat. Watch out! Because one of these days... TET will drop the sticks and pebbles in favor of knives and stones with sharp edges.

brunell 3 enis 0 kaufman 3 moss 0 keyshawn 3 bubba 0 gramatica 7
chandler 0 levens 3 bettis 12 carter 3 ed 9 walls 0 nedney 15
----------------------------------------------------------------------

During-the-Week Free Agent Pickups:

The whole weekend dibs queue system has been discussed to death over the years, so I will not discuss that again here. I would instead like to remind everyone that transactions made during the week are usually emailed to me only. Once I post these on the Transaction page, they become officially enacted. In order to stay abreast of the latest roster manipulations, be sure to visit the Transaction page at least daily. You might be surprised at some of the talent that changes hands during the week.

For example, let's take a look at the following timeline:

Wed, 9am: Stan sends a depth chart email to me and Brodz (his opponent that weekend) in which he also drops Jim Harbaugh in favor of Trent Dilfer.

Wed, 10am: Brodz sees a report on ESPN in which Air Coryell agrees to take over the Chargers O, brings Chuck Muncie & Charlie Joiner & Wes Chandler & Kellen Winslow back, and installs Harbaugh at the "Dan Fouts" position.

Wed, 10:01am: Brodz - being the 1st GM to see the ESPN report AND possess the knowledge that Stan has dropped Harbaugh - sends an email to me requesting that he drop Tony Banks in favor of Jim Harbaugh.

Web, 10:02am: Brodz - mistakenly thinking that he has "The 2nd Coming of Kurt Warner" Harbaugh on his team - sends an email to the League GMs proclaiming that his Harbaugh acquisition has cemented the addition of yet another Steamroller trophy to his collection.

Wed, noon: I arrive at work, read Stan's 9am email, and post the transaction (and new depth chart for Stan) on the RFL site.

Wed, 12:00:01pm: the 24 hour "during the week" dibs queue on Harbaugh has now officially commenced.

Wed, 12:01pm: I send an email to Brodz telling him that he is in the 24-hour queue for Harbaugh.

Wed, 12:02pm: I send an email to the League reminding everyone that Brodz does *not* yet have Harbaugh, and in fact... Harbaugh is open game for EVERYONE.

Thur, noon: the 24 hours on Harbaugh's waiver period expires, and out of the 16 claims for Harbaugh... I determine that Joebob will receive the RFL MVP-to-be - due to Joebob's last place ranking in the League standings.

In an alternate universe: Brodz does not send the 10:02am "gloating" email, only Richard checks the Transaction page to see that Harbaugh is out in the open, Richard & Brodz & Stan & I are the only 4 to put in claims for Harbaugh, and Richard ends up "sneaking" Harbaugh onto his team.

*************************************************
RFL GM Profiles: Wally Grayeski, GM, Crazed Beagles on the Run
*************************************************

Wally Grayeski, GM of the infamous Crazed Beagles on the Run, is one of RFL's most colorful members. The public has often asked the question - What is he - A crazed lunatic, incapable of a single logical thought? OR a brilliant (yet controversial) revolution leader who dares defy the commish? This interview brings us 1 step closer to answering that question.

RFL Week in Review Editing Staff: Wally, you are possibly one of the most hated GMs in the League. From your lucky teams, your constant 1 man revolts, annoying emails, and so on... let's just say that you won't be getting Xmas cards from many of us GMs. Is this part of your RFL "Image"? Or is it just your personality?

Wally Grayeski: Wow, this question is really coming out of left field. However, I don't waste my time worrying about the other GMs in the League. Over the last two years I have focused on my team and avoided the low handed politics associated with GMs like yourself, Joebob. This is probably why I have the 2nd best winning percentage in the League over the last two years. As I see it, this year I'm the team to beat.

RFL: Let's talk a little bit about your brother Brian. A lot of people (myself included) pulled a lot of strings to get him into the League last year. He did nothing more than embarrass himself, embarrass you, and most importantly, embarrass the League with his pathetic draft and pathetic play. In a poll recently run by ESPN on who was the worst RFL GM in the 20th century, Brian won by a landslide. First - do you still talk to him? And if so, how do you even begin to defend him?

WG: Minus a few injuries to my brother's top picks, it's clear that he would have made it to the playoffs. If you were to apply this year's rules to last year, I have calculated that he would have finshed the season 10 & 5. I do talk to Brian frequently, and he vows to rumble with the commish next time they cross paths. If I were Wang I would avoid Palo Alto.

RFL: The "Backstab Dylan Incident". A secret email sent to the Commish only from you that says, "Dylan does not want to be in the League - my brother does - let my Brother in"! To this interviewer here, that is one of the lowest acts of ethics that I have ever seen. As a result we lost a valued member of the RFL community in Dylan Steeg. How do you begin to explain what happened?

WG: Joe, I look back on this and laugh. Dylan got in my way, and I ran him over like any other speed bump which gets in my way. If you don't filter out the weak every once in a while, how would keep improving on the League image? This is the same reason you asked me into the League. I don't think any other GM brings in the fans like the Crazed Beagles. Well, I take that back. I don't think anyone can compete with Wang when he sports the fluorescent green Yankees jacket.
[Commish's comment: I'll be wearing it out to Pac Bell Park during the Yankees-Giants World Series next month!!!]

RFL: You don't mind making enemies do you? Moving on - the leg injury... rumors have started surfacing that it is the result of an outraged Emmitt Smith (back when he was your star player in your rookie season) manhandling you with his barehands when he got word of some of your slimy dealings? Thoughts? And it is true that you have not had Emmitt on your team since that year, correct?

WG: Emmitt had his chance to be on the team and didn't and decided to sit out during the Aglione Bowl. The Crazed Beagles on the Run don't need players who don't know what it takes to win. This type of effort is why Emitt will never be a Walter Payton. That and the fact he plays on a loser team like the Cowboys.
[Commish's comment: Emmitt *did* the Beagles last night.]

RFL: Commish Wang - one senses a change about the way he is running the League, handling issues, etc. What are your thoughts. Has he been bought? Is own desire to win clouding his judgment? Do you still feel that he is the best man for the job?

WG: Last year I heard rumors about the commish getting into drugs and gambling. I think it's clear that things have gotten out of control. The omnipotent approach to the commissioner position and the erratic decisions are starting to take away from his great work creating the RFL web site. My sources are now telling me that the Alliance has bought Wang's debt. If the commish can get is life back on track, I think he's the right man for the job. However, today he cannot be trusted.

RFL: Strong words, my friend, strong words. The Alliance - let's get right to it... Are you a member? Is Clark the true leader of this alliance or is he just a puppet to the true alliance creator - perhaps the Commish?

WG: No, I am not in the Alliance! However, I do know that the commish is not in control. He is just a puppet strung out on drugs and in debt to the Alliance.

RFL: One gets the feeling that you're anti-Commish. That's a whole separate interview for another time. What are your thoughts on your team this year. Do you feel this is your year? Or are you already back to the drawing board?

WG: SHOW ME THE MONEY!!!! Joe, I've got the team to beat this year.

RFL: The Draft this year had a different feel. The lack of refreshments, dinner, cramped quarters. One got the feeling that RFL is in a cost cutting situation. What are your thoughts on what is going on in regards to RFL - the business? Is the League in trouble?

WG: It was plain sloppy. The commish needs to really look in the mirror and decide what it's going to take for him to step up his performance. If it wasn't for the fact that Wang is not allowed in any of the Las Vegas hotels, we could have done this draft in style. Next year I want Sushi.

RFL Closing Statement: Wally, it's been a pleasure to gain this insight into your demented mind. It's safe to say that both myself and the rest of RFL has gained a whole new understanding of Wally Grayeski. Best of luck for the season.

This has been an RFL interview. The rights to all proceeds made from this interview belong to the RFL WIR and exclusively to the RFL WIR.
********************************************************
SEASON POINTS LEADERS
*********************
QB
39 Kurt Warner (Carpet Bombers)
33 Daunte Culpepper (Heirs to the Ayatollah)
27 Rich Gannon (Black Ops)

RB
63 Marshall Faulk (Heirs to the Ayatollah)
39 Edgerrin James (%$!@#&)
36 Stephen Davis (Curly Back Hair)
33 Mike Alstott (Nasty Pimps)
30 Duce Staley (Merry Munching Merkins)
30 Curtis Martin (Minnesota Nice)

WR
42 Jimmy Smith (Carpet Bombers)
30 Rod Smith (TheArmchairQBAdventurePlayset(tm))
26 Terrell Owens (Nasty Pimps)
21 Isaac Bruce (Fresh Squeezed)
18 Marvin Harrison (The Determined Sperm Which Squirm...)
18 Antonio Freeman (Crazed Beagles on the Run)
18 Jacquez Green (Heirs to the Ayatollah)
18 Donald Hayes (All Jacked Up)
18 Muhsin Muhammad (Nasty Pimps)
18 Keenan McCardell (TheArmchairQBAdventurePlayset(tm))
18 Tim Brown (Merry Munching Merkins)

TE
15 Wesley Walls (Na Brown's Boys)
15 Jay Riemersma (Crazed Beagles on the Run)
12 Shannon Sharpe (Fire in the Hole)

PK
29 Jeff Wilkins (Fire in the Hole)
27 Mike Hollis (The Determined Sperm Which Squirm...)
25 Jason Hanson (Black Ops)

be sure to check:
The RFL Season Point Leaders page
...for an expanded list of scoring leaders.

Clark	Advantage	Cals
VTestaverde		CMcNown
EGeorge		JAnderson
TBarber		SMack
PWarrick		IBruce
CPickens		GCrowell
FJones		JHarris
PEdinger		MStover

405 Fremont housemate vs. (former) housemate, playoff pretender vs. pretender... the winner gets a huge boost towards a spot in the postseason. The loser has to scrub the 405 Fremont toilets for a year. Clark's AJU will be virtually at full-strength for this showdown. Cals' FS will be short former UMich classmate Touchdown Timmy B. Tiki Barber will give All Jacked Up its largest advantage in the RB2 matchup. Fresh Squeezed will try to make up the difference with IBruce.
Although the arrows seem to favor Clark, Cals' team has shown a more consistent level of play between the white lines this year. Look for Cals' team to be more comfortable with the GOTW spotlight.

**** Cals calls it: Fresh Squeezed by 2 ****

©1999-2000 RFL Inc.
All rights reserved.

Revised: September 19, 2000